On-Star

I hope my next car has on-star. Stacy and I joke that if we had on-star, we could call up them up to chat.
"Hello. This is on-star. How may I help you?"
"Whatcha doing?"
"Ma'am, is this an emergency?"
"Yes! I am having a shopping emergency!"
"But ma'am, you are in the parking lot of a mall."
"Hellllloooo. I know that. I can't find a space to park."
"Well, Ma'am, drive around until someone leaves. Would you like me to stay on the line until you find one?"
"Thanks, you are like my virtual BFF. I like it in the commercials when you offer to stay on the line when people are waiting for help. My favorite one is when the mom locks her keys and baby in the car and you unlock the door for her, it makes me cry every time."
"Me too ma'am."
"REALLY??"
"No. It doesn't."
"So, do you know where I am at all times?"
"Yes, I do, and those pants make your butt look big, or maybe your butt makes your butt look big."
"I found a spot. Thanks for staying on the line with me."
"No problem ma'am. Is there any other way I can be of assistance today?"
"No. Will this conversation make it to in the commercials?"
"Dream on ma'am."
I think it'd be awesome to have on-star. It's like a new friend in a little box.
I have been getting phone calls lately from a 201 phone number. I've received about four in the last week. They all start out with, "Will you please join us in the fight to keep drugs off our streets?" They go on to ask for donations. I told them twice to take me off of their call list, once they left a message and a phone number to call to "join in the fight", and last night while making supper they called again. Nothing seems to work in getting rid of these people. I looked up the 'do not call' rules on the internet and people asking for donations CAN call you! It is legal to ignore your requests to DO NOT CALL! Imagine my children's surprise last night when I yelled, "Leave me alone! I love drugs!!" Hee heeee. I outsmarted them!